A Little (Short) Encouragement for your Holiday Gathering…Merry Christmas!

The holidays are stressful and wonderful for many reasons. Yet one reason that can also add anxiety, and even dread, is family gatherings. It is the same for so many; we gather around the kitchen, telling stories, retelling stories over and over as if telling for the first time. My children have heard many of the stories we tell every year since birth; even still, they say each time that they have never heard that one before. It never fails.

Often, the retelling of these stories evokes emotion. We laugh and banter, trying to diminish the effect, however, underlying the ruse is hurt, frustration, and a deep desire to defend yourself by wanting to tell the story as it happened or to say that it is not who you are anymore. Maybe even stronger is the desire for your family to stand up for you without hesitation. Underscoring the growth and grace that you have fought so hard to attain.

I want to encourage you as you prepare to come together over the holidays or any gathering of family or friends in the future. One of the first signs to defend oneself is temper. According to Andrew Murray, temper is the evidence of whether the love of God is “filling the heart.” This is so helpful. In the moment you feel the temper start to rise, be mindful. Immediately go to the Lord in prayer. He is your ever-present help in your time of need (Psalm 46:1). Take a practical approach, get up and clear the table, offer to refill drinks, go check on the children, or start to wash the dishes. Serving others is the quickest way to diffuse a situation and offer a moment to pray and receive help from the Lord.

Let me speak directly to you for a moment. God is working in your life. Let these moments be an opportunity to stand for the work He has begun in you and let the testing prove to build the perseverance that builds the maturity so that you may be perfected, lacking nothing (Philippians 1:6, James 1:2-4).  Also, stay humble. Own your past, have grace for the one telling the story, and if necessary, politely say that is not how you remember it. Offer a transition statement, like, “God has been good to me,” or “Praise God for His goodness to me.” Then, offer to refill those drinks.

Let your temper be used to remind you that you need Christ each moment, let it be an opportunity for you to lean in to the Lord as He will stand with you when no one else will. He is a sure foundation (Isaiah 33:6).

Additionally, God gave us our emotions for a reason. They alert us. We are not to ignore the feelings but bring them to the Lord and ask why we feel that way. Maybe you need to be reminded of God’s promise to you; maybe you need to see again all God has done for you and the healing that has already taken place. Maybe, God is giving you an opportunity to tell others how God has changed your life and speak up that will change the conversation in the future.

Finally, let this be a reminder that other family members may feel the same way. Look for opportunities to stand up for them. Watch for their tempers and be quick to offer a kind word of affirmation. Retelling a story can be great fun, but it does not need to hurt someone in the process, adding more harm. Maybe some stories need not be told. Maybe the more vulnerable stories need to be shared, offering hope to those who are listening. These stories of grace, thankfulness, and telling someone you are proud of them and that you love them will be the healing balm that could change everything.

Emmanuel, God with us. Let us make room for Him at the table.

Heather

A New Thing, Just Hold On…

As a friend recently reminded me, it has been a while since I have written. I have some big news coming, so I thought I would give a quick update from the past several months. It seems we have been in the fast lane, waving at everyone as we pass by. This has been a season, this has been the excuse—whichever way you want to frame it. Regardless, it feels more like a “fly by the seat of our pants” moment than “in the flow.”

I guess in some seasons, the pendulum can swing high and fast one way, which means that it will fall low and hard the other way, and back and forth until it slows to the “new” equilibrium. This is us right now, slowing to a new normal.

Because it is new, it doesn’t feel familiar and steady just yet. However, I am reminded of Isaiah 43:19: “Behold, I will do a new thing, now it shall spring forth; shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.”

This verse has meant so much to me over the years. I can remember the first time that I read this and felt the Lord say to me—during a very dark season—”just hold on.” It has shown up many times in other seasons when I wanted answers and felt so desperate for something to change.

However, the encouragement in those moments “to hold on” was attached to my idea of what a “new thing” could possibly mean. I can quickly offer the Lord several scenarios for Him to consider. It would be a momentary balm to my heart—to dream and imagine things the way I want them to be or think they should be. In those moments, I am so far down in the trenches that anything can feel better than the current circumstances. Yet, my mind is on repeat, I keep going back to the hard moment I find myself in, begging God to do something, even something new, then I attach my ideas of the “new thing” He could do and repeat, over and over again, just going around in a circle.

The good and maybe hard thing here is to understand that “I am doing” is in the present, active tense, which means that it is happening in the present and is ongoing, in each present moment. 🙂

The good news is that God is always working on our behalf to accomplish His will in our lives—new things. The hard news is that He is always working on our behalf to accomplish His will in our lives—new things.

During a hard and trusting season, we want relief. It can feel like a roller coaster of ups and downs—times of refreshment with deep times of trench work, i.e., prayer, fasting, digging into God’s Word, and waiting—so much waiting. Yet, a verse like this will comfort us with a promise that this too shall pass. Embedded in this hope is that there will be an end and then felt relief.

The greater reality is that God is constantly doing a “new thing,” and He is asking you if you can perceive it. This underscores the expectation of what it means to walk with God: into new territory that has yet to be claimed for His glory. It may be greater “yieldedness” to His purpose for your life, greater surrender to His plan, or greater trust in Him for His will to be done. Collectively, it is always about faith. Is He trustworthy? Is He good?

The temptation is to be single-focused on how God will do a “new thing” in my life. However, rarely do His plans only involve you. Usually, our prayers and petitions involve someone we care deeply about. Even if that someone is ourselves, the plan will often involve orchestrating others to bring it about. For instance, doctors to bring the diagnosis, a company to offer a job, or a person to bring dinner. So much in the works to bring about deliverance. He is always working on our behalf. The hard part is to stay the course.

Every now and again, God will let us see a glimpse of what He is up to. I call these green pasture moments, where He leads us beside the still waters and restores our souls (Psalms 23). Our flesh, when we come to these moments, wants to stop maybe even quit. Yet, we are on a journey. This is a moment of refreshment, but our eyes must stay set on where God is taking us.

And where is God taking us? I love this so much. This is a soul-deep promise to each of us. He is taking us to the “immeasurably more than we can ask or imagine” (Ephesians 3:20). This means when I attach my ideas of a “new thing” that I think He can do for me to bring relief and rest to my wandering weary soul, I am limiting God to only what I can see. I make God small and finite into my limited views.

Honestly, what we long for, what God has for us, is so much more. And left to Him to do only what He can do is so much better. Why do we settle for a temporary moment of reprieve when He has that plus so much more for us that genuinely satisfies us but also sustains us during the hard seasons because He beckons us to come to Him:

“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

God is doing a “new thing.” “Can you not perceive it?”

Be encouraged to look up from where you are. Let Him give you a fresh perspective into His kindness. He is a good, good Father, and He loves you. Are you surrounded by others who can speak these words of truth over you while you are face down in the trenches doing important work? Maybe more importantly today, can you muster a breath to the Lord and ask Him to show you His glory? Just a glimpse can change your life forever.

Blessings,

Heather

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